"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.
No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.
"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".
The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet. (Now, you KNOW you're going to try this out for accuracy, right?)
The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).
There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
A snail can sleep for three years.
Almonds are a member of the peach family.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.
If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.
Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.
Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!
Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.
The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.
There are more chickens than people in the world.
Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
Now you know everything!
My husband came home last night and was telling me about one of the ladies at work.
Her husband was showing her how to use their new riding mower the other evening and their dog was bouncing around all excited. Then next thing she knew, somehow she'd run over the dog's tail and had mowed it off. Yikes! She was all upset and crying and her husband was cool as a cucumber. He told her, "No problem. We'll just put him (the dog) in the car and take him to Walmart."
She asked him, "Walmart? Why the heck would we take him to Walmart?!!"
"Because," he told her,
"Walmart is the world's largest retailer!"
Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.
One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.
The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.
After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride broom leaned over and said to the groom broom, 'I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!'
'IMPOSSIBLE !' said the groom broom.
Are you ready for this?
Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.
'WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!'
These are actual comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were reprimanded but, boy, are these funny!!!
1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom
and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve
them.
6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to
hold it all together.
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000
others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.